Wedding Vows Create Emotional and Sexual Intimacy

Last week I went searching for the answer to this question: What are the needs of men and women? I found they were the same.

Both men and women are looking for intimacy.

That's where the similarities end because women went emotional intimacy and men want physical intimacy.

It's a catch 22. Men, without actually saying so, are saying, "Give me sex and you'll get intimacy."

Women are saying, "Give me intimacy and I'll give you sex."

What a situation. But I can help. Your wedding vows, in particular, can help, because if you take time to write meaningful vows in shared conversation that sets the beginning of a pattern that can be sustained.

If you've been reading my blogs or the material on my web site you know that after you have read the vows at your wedding that is not the end of them.

You've got to make them into a Law of Attraction. Meaning that your vows have the potential to draw to you, almost effortlessly, everything you need to live the life of your dreams. That includes ideas, people, things, and experiences.

I'm going to say it again and again: You create a Law of Attraction by rereading your vows over and over and over until they have imprinted themselves into your mind, your body and your life. It's your thinking and your beliefs that create your reality. Reading your vows over and over and over again are a habit well worth cultivating.

Set a copy of your vows next to each bedside table so that each of you can read them, even if only a few lines, every night before you go to sleep. That way they go to work on your subconscious, which is the real attractor factor because your subconscious is like your hard drive and you know that your computer won't do anything that it is not programmed to do.

What you are doing is reprogram your mind to create, to draw to you all the elements of the dream you have for yourself and your marriage, and to recognize them when they show up. You are going to override old patterns and install new ones.

When people ask you how you are you can honestly and with enthusiasm say, "I'm livin' the dream!"

As you live the dream there will be more energy for life, for each other, for the marriage, for everything. Passion soars, intimacy skyrockets and both of you get more what you want easily.

Once a month read those vows together. That opens conversation and builds trust and empathy, and even more intimacy. It also gives you both an opportunity to check in with each other before big problems arise.

Is it really that easy to maintain intimacy and even expand it so both partners get what they need?

Yes and no. Yes if you consciously build a dream into your vows, take them seriously and repeat them until they are installed on your personal operating system.

No, if you don't take them seriously.

I'm not saying that there will never be challenges or problems. What I'm saying is that you will be more equipped to grow through them instead of making them into walls.

There will be more love, more laughter, more emotional intimacy and more sex!

Sounds simple but then I believe that most answers are simple. We tend to try to make them bigger than they are.

You can see more blogs and access my Ebook on The Secret Life of Wedding Vows-How to Write Vows That Create Powerful Marriages at www.weddingvowsandceremonies.com

Love, light and laughter,

Rev. Linda