Writing Wedding Vows--Whose Model is it Anyway?

You will write your own personal and unique wedding vows based on certain expectations you have for your life.

I refer to this as the dream you have for your life together. By being clear about the way your want your life together to be, writing it down as vows and then pledging and promising what you will do to keep those vows alive, thriving, vital and intimate you stand a better chance of living the life of your dreams.

Yet what if those dreams are almost entirely driven by the models you have had in your life? Your parents, your grandparents, your friends parents, and other couples close to you. All of them have influenced your life in ways you can’t imagine.

Those models drive the behaviors that run your relationships. Those behaviors are what I am referring to as your default operating system.

So I will ask you two questions: Are you repeating the behaviors of the people who came before you? Do you want to repeat those behaviors?

This is not a judgmental question. I ask it just so you will have to think about the answer.

Were your models strong, loving, supportive models or were they weak or dysfunctional?

That awareness and honesty can change your life!

I want you to get as clear as you can how you want your life to be like. Forget the ‘what is my purpose’ stuff. You can’t wait around to find out your purpose. Get clear about what you want your life to be like and create a dream from that. Your purpose will appear as you live your best life.

You do not have to throw out the baby with the bathwater, however. Be aware of what aspects of your models you want to keep. Forget about what you don’t want. You want to focus on the positive and life-enhancing attitudes and habits.

What you focus on is what you will reproduce! Which is why it is good if you train yourself to see only what supports the life you want to lead.

Review those vows over and over again. As you do that you keep that dream of the life you want to live in front of you. The way you react to life, to each other, to situations and experiences will begin to change because you begin to reprogram your default operating system.

You are going to add new emotional software that little by little erases and reprograms your life.

Then if anyone asks you, “Whose life is this anyway?” you will be able to answer, MINE!

Love, light and laughter,

Rev. Linda, The Wedding Vow Coach

Helping couples write down the dream and then live it!
www.WeddingVowsandCeremonies.com