Writing Wedding Vows-How to Breathe Life Into Your Vows-A Ritual

When writing your wedding or commitment vows keep in mind that you will want to keep them alive and thriving. I have a new ritual that you can use at your ceremony to anchor in the heart of your vows and to give you something you can continue to repeat that will reinvigor and return you to the spirit of the dream that you wrote into your vows.

You are going to literally ‘breathe life into your vows.’

The other day I was thinking about a conference I went to in Hawaii. One morning a Kahuna came to talk to us about Hawaiian spirituality. He and a member of the group participated in an intimate exchange of breath.

You don’t do this with just anyone. It’s a deep ritual of love and trust and honor.

In the Bible, God breathed life into Adam by breathing into his nostrils.

So there is some long and deep history here with this ‘breath of life.’ It seems that it is a primal thing. Indeed, when you participate in this ‘breath of life’ you feel as though you are at the very creation of life.

The ‘honi’ is a Polnesian greeting in which two people greet each other by pressing noses and inhaling at the same time. It represents the exchange of ha–the breath of life–and mana–spiritual power between two people.

Doesn’t it make sense that this would be the perfect ritual to associate with your vows. Because if you take advantage of this time to write vows that have a strong dream and movement in them, they are like creating a new life.

First read or recite your vows. Then step together and press foreheads and the tips of your noses together. When one person breaths out, at the same time the other person breathes in, exchanging the very essence of each other and mingling it. Keep this up until it feels complete.

I haven’t worked out who should start but you’ll figure that out. Practice it.

The officiant can say something like this before you begin the ritual:

“Your vows are the sacred exchange of your promises to each other. By exchanging your breaths, you are mingling the dream of your life together in a very deep and primal way, indicating to each other that you are emotionally, mentally and spiritually committed to your vows, each other, and your life together.”

Complete the ritual by keeping your foreheads together but bending your heads so you are no longer breathing each other’s breaths.Then each of you put your hands on the other’s shoulders or take hold of your hands and look into each other’s eyes.

“Look into each other’s eyes and see that you cannot be separated because you have shared the very life of (God) (the Universe) (Allah) etc. You are filled.”

Finish by lightly brushing each others lips in a sacred kiss. This is different than a passionate hungry kiss. It’s simple and light and joy filled.

Learn how to write beautiful, meaningful vows that have the potential to keep going and going and going. Click her.

Love, light and laughter,

Rev. Linda Bardes, The Wedding Vow Coach

Helping couples write down the dream and then live it!